Life and death.

I feel like I've been...thinking...a lot more than usual. I've been taking more time to just think. I've been through some difficult times but for the most part, my life is so easy. My family is financially secure, I go to a great school where I don't have to worry about my safety and a school that I love. There have been several people in my life who have passed on...and death is so confusing to me. I don't think we can ever really understand it until it happens and well, then you can't come back and tell anyone how it goes. I know that lots and lots of people die each day...is there someone who cares for all of these people? Is there someone planning a funeral for them? Whenever I see a homeless person, I'm sad for them. I can't imagine not having a home or the neccessities essential for life...but what about death? When they die, who will remember them? It breaks my heart. What I'm trying to get at is, I want to make an impact during my life. You can't change anything once it's over. Once your life is lived, once you have died, you can't come back and say, 'Oh shit, I really didn't mean to do this...' or 'I really do love you dad, I wish I had shown it more'. It's something that I myself need to work on - if I died today, would I be happy with the way I had lived my life? I'm a procrastinator. I often wait to do projects until the last minute, homework and basically everything too. I often say, "I'll do it later/tomorrow/soon." and then it never happens but I need to change my life now. If there are things that I am doing that I don't want to be done, that I don't want me to be remembered by, I need to change them because life is a gift. It isn't a given, it's a gift. It can be taken away in the blink of an eye. A young man who graduated from my highschool a few years ago passed away last week. He was hit by a drunk driver...25 years old. A life cut short. Rest in peace.

Holly and I are in the beginning stages of beginning the nonprofit. I'll reveal more details soon but I am very excited.

A picture is worth a thousand words.

McKenna Maiorana

hopeforbabymckenna.com

twitter.com/hopeforbabymckenna

Stage 4 Neuroblastoma

Ellie Potvin

liftupellie.com

caringbridge.org/visit/elliepotvin

twitter.com/liftupellie

twitter.com/amypotvin
Stage 4 Rhabdomyosarcoma

Keegan Ray

caringbridge.org/visit/superkeeganray

twitter.com/teamsuperkeegan
Neuroblastoma

Kate McRae

prayforkate.com

twitter.com/prayforkate

twitter.com/aaronmcrae
caringbridge.org/visit/mcraekate

Brain tumor

Layla Grace Marsh

11/26/2007-3/9/2010

laylagrace.org

twitter.com/laylagrace

Stage 4 Neuroblastoma
Rest in peace, sweet angel.

These kids are all fighting for their lives. Layla Grace lost her battle. Only time will tell if McKenna, Keegan, Ellie, and Kate will win theirs. But truly, they have already won. Layla won. Layla is healed. She is not healed in the way that all of us hoped and prayed for. We asked the Lord to cure Layla Grace of her cancer and restore her to being a typical, happy 2-year-old. But that was not His plan. He did cure Layla, though. She is cured and she is looking down upon her mom, Shanna, her dad, Ryan, and her beautiful sisters, Jenna and Claire.

McKenna, Keegan, Ellie, and Kate are all fighting a very long road, a long battle. The battle doesn't end when the doctors declare remission. This battle is lifelong. It breaks my heart to see kids like this. Looking at the pictures above, you see pain but you also see peace. Kids have a way with dealing with hardships and obstacles that adults do not have. Kids live for the moment. These children aren't worried about tomorrow - they are living for today. As humans, all people have worries and fears. But our fears are so insignificant compared to what this precious angels are going through.

Today, I couldn't get Layla Grace out of my head. Every word I spoke and every thought that ran through my head, I just heard echoes of "Layla..Layla..Layla". It made me sad but it also made me happy. Layla will not be forgotten. She did not die in vain. She gave hope and inspiration to so many people. She'll always be remembered for that.

For now, all of these children above (besides Layla Grace) have a long journey ahead. Chemotherapy for some, radiation for others and for all of them, there is a hope and faith that remission will be in the near future. There needs to be a cure for cancer. Cancer is taking so many people each day...cutting so many lives short. We all have to come together to tell cancer, "STOP! YOU CAN'T take Ellie! You CAN'T take McKenna! You CAN'T take Kate! You CAN'T take Keegan! And DAMN YOU for taking Layla Grace!"

I hate cancer. It sucks. Sucks doesn't even really cover it. Getting a pimple sucks. Cancer is evil, vile, just awful. And it effects everyone in some way. Someone that you know has cancer. I can only pray that there is a cure in the near future.

Please pray for McKenna Maiorana, Ellie Potvin, Keegan Ray, Kate McRae and for the loving family of Layla Grace Marsh. Please pray for those who aren't listed above of course, as well. Kids with cancer are so special. They have a spirit to them that is amazing and a blessing from God.

Dear Lord, we ask you to heal these children. Let your will be done, Lord, but pretty please let these beautiful children live long healthy lives? Help their families to be strong. And please tell Layla Grace a special hello from all of her loving supporters her on Earth. Take care of her, O God, watch over her and help to ease her family's pain. Amen.